Reflections on a new Father’s Day experience

FirstFathersDay

On March 20, 2015 my life forever changed. That morning I received a phone call no one wants to receive. Hearing my mother try to get a few words out amongst the tears was all I needed to know that life was suddenly different. That Friday morning I lost my best friend, mentor, coach, motivator, and father. It was in a blink of an eye, in a moment, that my dad went home to be with our Heavenly Father.

The journey God has placed me on since that day has been one of putting pieces back together (for posts to come). It has been a journey that has caused me to lean heavily on the promises we receive from God through his Word. Verses such as Psalm 34:18 and 1 John 5:13 have served as sources of encouragement and hope.

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18 (ESV)

“I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life.” 1 John 5:13 (ESV)

No thing or person can ever replace my dad, but God has given me gifts along the way to encourage and lift me up. He has blessed me in some immeasurable ways.

The greatest blessings came on Tuesday, May 17, 2016 at 10:35 PM in a hospital delivery room. It was on that day and at that time, my son Jacob entered the world and took his very first breath with a loud and last crying. To be honest the cry hasn’t seemed to go away, but the love I have for him only grows deeper every day.

This Father’s Day marked a moment where he and I could go pay tribute to the grandfather he will not meet in this world. It was a moment in time where I could feel the passing of the torch from one generation to another. A moment where I could begin to take all my dad instilled in me and pass it on to him.

In this moment I whispered the words my dad spoke to me over and over again growing up…

“Son, I am so proud of you.”

These words were ones that drew my dad and I close. They were words that let me know he loved me. They were words that gave me strength. Through the years my dad would tell me these simple words. If I spent an entire game chewing sunflower seeds on the bench or achieved great success, he would simply say, “I am so proud of you.”

If there is a simple gift we can give our children, it is for them to know we are proud of them. This is something I pray I can make sure Jacob knows throughout his life. From the moments when he poops all over me to the times when he does something remarkable, I want him to always know he has a proud father.

There was another element I wanted my son to witness this Father’s Day. That was the experience of watching his father praise the Lord Jesus Christ.

My dad was never a  Biblical scholar. He never had the cleanest mouth or best actions. However, he was a man who had a deep love and passion for his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He knew that no matter what, God was there for him.

This Father’s Day and for all those to come, my prayer is that Jacob will see a dad who loves a Father even greater than his earthly father. My dad was my best friend, mentor, coach, motivator, and father; but he was not my heavenly Father.

I love how Proverbs 22:6 explains, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

What is it that we would want our children to know? What could I tell my son that lets him know the love God has for him?

What my dad told me over and over again was simple.

“Son, I love you, but you have a God who loves you more than I ever can.”

My prayer is for my son Jacob to know the love God has for him. That each and every day he will see his dad living for a God who is so much greater than anything or anyone in this world. The opportunity is there, will I seize it? I sure hope so.

Today marked a special day. It was my first Father’s Day as a dad, my second Father’s Day without my dad, but also the beginning of an amazing new journey. A time where I can now seize the opportunity to teach and love my son the way my dad did. I can take a hold of opportunities God gives me to show my son how great his Heavenly Father is.

Today had moments of tears, but it was also full of so much praise!

Picture Perfect

10359022_10202325456398858_3510011890253746843_oWhat is “picture perfect?”

I believe everyone to some degree wants to have a “picture perfect” life. We all want to achieve success, feel good, and enjoy the time God has given us in this world. We want to be able to establish lasting relationships and have successful careers.

Since the time of Plato and other early philosophers, humanity has striven to achieve “the good life.” In striving for it, we have also tried to show it off.

Kings built palaces to show their might and power. Celebrities have fancy cars, expensive clothes and nice homes. Parents have bought the latest and greatest gadgets and toys for their kids. Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter are filled with pictures of our families, captured at just the right moment to show everything as just right.

Even our phones now have a feature where we can take rapid photos, so we can capture just the perfect smile or look.

In and of themselves these things are not bad, but why do we strive for them? Why do we seek to look good to everyone around us?

I believe it is because we as humans want to be known. We want others to see the good things in our lives. We want things to be “picture perfect.”

As a young follower of Jesus, I believed having faith in him would lead to a happy and fulfilling life. I was told that Jesus was all I needed.

To me this meant following Jesus would save me from the bullies at school. It would allow for me to date the right girls. It would bring me happiness in this world that seems to be full of so many challenges. As a young follower, I thought following Jesus would mean I would be protected from the heartbreak of this world.

The reality is that following Jesus doesn’t lead to a “picture perfect” life here on this earth, but often times the exact opposite.

When talking with his disciples, Jesus did not promise them a “picture perfect” life. Although, I am sure that’s what they could have dreamed of, it was not a promise they were given. Instead Jesus told them,

“In this world you will have many trials and sorrows.” John 16:33 (NLT)

Could you imagine hearing this? Just reading it makes me shutter. It makes me fearful.

As my journey with Jesus, has progressed, I have found this to be so true. My life has been full of loss, grief, pain, and hardship. It has been filled with broken hearts, disappointment, bad news, and feelings of abandonment.

The journey I have been on has been full of challenges, but also so many celebrations. Immediately after telling his disciples they would face many trials, Jesus said these powerful words…

“But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 (NLT)

Yes, this world is not a perfect world. It is not “picture perfect.” But we do have a picture perfect God. We have a God that is there for us even when it seems no one else is.

He is there as we mourn. He is there when we cry. He is there when we feel completely alone.

This blog is simply a place to tell a story. It is to tell the story of how God has shown up. How he has been there for me, even when I wanted to give up. Even when my life was not so “picture perfect.”

In the posts to come, we will talk about prayer, Scripture, and community. We will talk about how God has helped me get through the loss of friends, the passing of my father, struggles with the local church, and the many challenges that come with simply journeying through the thing we call life.

We will look at how God is right by our side even when things aren’t always “picture perfect.”